Jack: I had “lunch” with Martha Stewart and “dinner” with her daughter Alexis.
Liz: Gross.

Jack: Lemon, I want to thank you. For showing me that I could have a pleasant evening with a woman my age.
Liz: I’m twelve years younger than you.
Jack: A woman your age then.

Jack: Just to know she’s filled with bile over me warms my heart.

Jenna: Gerhardt, would you like to dance?
Gerhardt: Sadly because my body does not produce joint fluid, I cannot.

Girl: (to Pete) Your name sounds Jewish. You must be important.

Bianca: Congratulations John, she’s much sharper than the other girl you had what was her name?
Jack: Beyonce.

Jenna: Oh, hello.
Liz: Hi. How did you get in here?
Jenna: Oh Liz, if you dress well and enter with confidence, you can get in anywhere.
Liz: You showed the security guy your boobs didn’t you?
Jenna: Just one, it’s not the White House.

Jenna: Oh Liz, its always been my dream to marry a prince, like a modern day Cinderella story.
Liz: Well maybe I’m Cinderella this time!
Jenna: No, Liz. Cinderella is blonde. You can be Snow White and party with the little people.

Liz: Okay fine I’ll do it, but I’m not going to like it.
Jack: Thats what your mom said to me last night, booya!

Jenna: You know I’ve always reminded myself of Grace Kelly.

This article was posted on Saturday, May 26th, 2007 at 1:31 pm by Burr and is filed under the category Quotes. You can follow any responses to this article through the RSS 2.0 feed.